Sundeelia: On Self-Healing
Whether or not the consciousness residing within this physical vehicle has been either my sister, Tazjma, or myself, Sundeelia, I have learned to walk my own path without the benefit or need for much input from other people. This has, of course, led to the consternation, confusion, and rejection of ‘me’ by many former friends, acquaintances, and blood family relatives. Have I been bothered by this? Yes, at times, but eventually, in all cases, have released any self-condemnation and persevered, as I strove to follow my own inner guidance. So, my decisions do not make ‘sense’ to others; that is not my concern. Although I have been subjected to criticism and even libel from afar by some who would claim me as ‘family’, it has not stuck on my consciousness. I am aware of such dealings. I do not ignore them, but work on releasing whatever triggers arise from such knowledge. I do not allow the judgments of others to knock me from my path, my determination to listen to and follow the voiceless guidance from within. Nor do I judge these individuals for their lack of understanding. Resonating at a different frequency, they are incapable of understanding. They cannot understand the paradox that I have surrendered to on a daily basis. An individual cannot comprehend such experiences as I have, unless they, too, have lived it.
It may seem to some of the uninformed that I can be somewhat cold, detached, reserved, neutral. I am an observer of life here, not necessarily a full participant. My nature is somewhat introverted, hidden away from the public eye, a non-participant in the activities of humanity that seem to me to be shallow and predictable. I see certain behaviors in others as obvious patterns ingrained in a very damaged humanity through centuries of abuse and self-abuse. Therefore, I have refused to participate in these activities and instead, choose more solitary occupations, like writing, painting, and long walks.
Since losing contact with one who claimed to be another walk-in from star family, I have been very much physically alone, yet I have not faltered from completing my writing assignment. There is still much to write, to observe, but the time for many changes is fast approaching. So, of necessity, the writing may be put on hold or this blog may take yet another direction, as yet not quite revealed even to me.
I know I am not alone here. I can feel the attention of my mentors and guides and occasionally, when quiet, can overhear their comments and answers to questions I voice aloud. Yes, I talk to myself and yes, sometimes I am answered by the still small voice within. Whatever people might think about this and me, I really do not care. I did not come here to ‘fit’ into what passes for ‘society’ or its rules of engagement. I am not here to ‘be nice’ to those who do not comprehend or hear my inner voice.
I do take responsibility for my decisions and actions. My choices are made often quite slowly. Deemed a rebel in some quarters by former acquaintances and ‘strange’ by former family members, I shrug it off. Their feelings, their hurt, their rejection no longer hurts; it just is a state of being that I comprehend. I resonate at an entirely different level of consciousness than these others, including those who claim to be fragments or walk-ins of star family. There are a few who have endeavored to listen, to comprehend, and they are admitted cautiously into the inner sanctum, but still I am ever vigilant as the ways of the betrayer are many and this world has been under alien domination for a long time. All living here, including myself, have been affected in some manner or another, so I continue to shield and go deeper within for direction.
I am a female, yet I think like a male in some ways, without sympathy to the plight of those who complain about their circumstances. Currently, my own circumstances are not what you call luxurious, but I deal with it. I practice conservatively and cautiously, studying things at length until I am ready to make a decision. Still waters are deep, sometimes, but the inner currents are not always obvious to the onlooker.
Despite my overt neutrality, there is love within for humanity as a collective, else I would not be here in the first place. Why else would someone who was a successful member of the Pleiadian Outer Fleet want to walk-in to a somewhat disagreeable existence on the Planet of Lies? Out of a desire to assist in some manner that is still not fully comprehensible to me, either. I have faith that my purpose in being here, beyond my writing assignment, will eventually be made plain even to me, but that day has not yet arrived.
So, where am I going with this babble? Self-healing. Self-healing is or should be the priority of all those who are currently claiming to be ‘awake’. From my observations, it is not yet apparent even to those who have recently woken up from the dreamspell of the Matrix that they are still somewhat caught up within its skeins while they continue to criticize what they are seeing clearly for the first time in perhaps lifetimes. Being critical of others is yet another symptom of someone who has not yet tackled their own inner work of transmuting all thoughts, triggers, reactions, traumas related to ‘other’, those who are different, who oppose, who confront, who inhibit their innate freedoms.
Divorcing yourself from the Matrix takes courage. Stepping out beyond the comfortable expectations of ‘society’ and its spurious rules is frightening to many. They rather be miserable than be different. Why? It is the result of centuries of abuse by the people who have controlled various cultures, who have interfered with, programmed, maimed, killed, and destroyed entire cultures that were ‘different’. People have been intimidated and threatened to where they would rather embrace conformity even to false doctrines because they are fearful of dying. This tendency to identify with the abuser has been called Stockholm Syndrome. Everything taught to them by their mentors, parents, and leaders has indoctrinated them to the point where they actually would rather cling to the Lie than embrace the Truth as it is being revealed everyday if you know where to look.
Even those who claim to be starseeds, wayshowers, walk-ins can suddenly be overcome by the same fears that stalk humanity daily. It takes a strong individual to resist the siren call and fall in frequency, taking on the collective trauma of humanity as their own and complaining about being a victim of something that did not even occur to them personally. I have observed this tendency, this negation of purpose, this dereliction of duty in keeping the neutral perspective of one who is different and is meant to be different by purpose. Fear is the mind-killer and it can effectively trap even the well-prepared if not confronted and dissolved consciously and with sure knowledge of the power that can be channeled through the neutral co-creator with Divinity.
When an individual, whatever their origin, undertakes the determination to be responsible for their actions, thoughts, and interactions with others, their life begins to change. The waking individual will be challenged and confronted by those who are uncomfortable with the seemingly sudden change in direction, in thinking, in comprehending the world around them. They will be confronted, criticized, pressured, deemed ‘crazy’, subjected to libel, threats, and lies. Whether or not they can withstand this sort of treatment will determine whether or not they can handle the Light that will enter into their bodies as they determinedly take on the task of self-healing.
This is not an endeavor to be taken lightly, for although it involves Light, intelligence, as this step will initially divorce an individual from all they have come to know, accept and believe in the past. They will not know what to believe. They will be forced, compelled beyond reason to look within for answers. They will have to learn to see life with their inner eye rather than what appears to be real and isn’t. They will have to take responsibility for how they feel, act, think, and communicate to others. They will have to work on their own issues, not ignore what is happening to others, but to focus on understanding why certain things happen and repeat in life until one determines to react in a different manner.
‘You create your own life’ has become a mantra of the New Age religion. It is true in some respects, but is a shallow and rather pointless exercise designed to shame others because their life is not as fulfilling and wonderful as your own… at least until your life falls apart unexpectedly and you are suddenly unable to run away from the inner demons you have sought to suppress so assiduously in the deep recesses of your own subconscious. Did you create the catastrophe that has overtaken your shallow existence? If so, why?
Judgment of self or anyone else is self-defeating. What you throw out as mud hoping to strike down your opponent will return like a boomerang unto yourself. It’s called karma, energy, action. For every action there is a reaction. Your lies about someone will come back to haunt you, not the subject of your criticism.
So, taking responsibility and being observant of your own thoughts is vital during the process of returning to Self. It is the letting go of the common mindless practices ingrained into human behavior through traumatic abuse. Sensitive people often turn that outer abuse and direct it towards themselves, claiming to be a victim of someone else’s actions rather than determining how or why whatever happened can teach them on how to change their perspective or way of seeing something.
It took decades for my sister, Tazjma, to overcome the effects of being abused by her father. The why of what occurred took longer to understand, but some insight into the family background gave me some ideas although now it will never be quite brought to light… my blood father has been dead for over two decades now, but trauma lingers in the Light Body until it is confronted, dissolved, and released. And so, I have taken on this task which was completed, in main, by Tazjma herself before she left here. For those who are followers of ‘Q’ or alternative intel, both sides of the family were Masons of some sort or another. Tazjma refused to go there, to join the organization in its form as the Eastern Star, and I am left to learn more about the sordid history of masonic involvement in pedophilia and violence against humanity. I begin to comprehend Taz’s innate rejection of the energy behind and intentionally hidden from even the organization’s general membership below the fateful 33th rank, its dark Satanic, inhuman agenda that is active in the world today.
Humanity has been conditioned to hate itself, to belittle those who utilize very human creative traits, who think for themselves. It will take a lot of strength, determination, and courage to be able to stand up to the outer pressures in the face of so much thoughtless reactions from programmed people who have abdicated their power and have succumbed to the social expectations of others. Just look at the whole rigmarole surrounding a common cold (which is the body’s way of naturally shedding built-up toxins due to unhealthy habits) and the resulting push to vaccinate everyone for a non-existent ‘virus’. This whole year plus long ordeal has managed to wake up more people than any other event or occurrence in modern history, even the tragedy of 9/11… a tragedy designed by the erstwhile controllers to drive their cattle, humanity, into the trap they have been carefully planning for over centuries.
In order to understand what is going on in the world today, you have to first understand yourself and where you stand in terms of your beliefs, thoughts, actions/inactions, values, and how you wish to help, defend or confound others. It is up to the individual to make the changes, not to succumb to some outer force. Many people are unwilling to go to take that step towards giving ones allegiance to a higher calling. Only those who have felt the yearning to see a world different than the one they seem to see around them now; only those who have felt the fire within their heart center can step forward and be counted. Yet, even then, it is only those who work to clear out the inner trauma and pain, to release it, to cease blaming others for their circumstances, who are willing to release all they have known for all that is possible if one is in alignment with the unseen but felt eternal Cosmic Laws of Creation. When one acts in obedience to these laws, the Divine takes your hand and guides you through whatever the world attempts to throw your way. Obstacles become opportunities. Fear becomes love. Darkness fades in the dawning of enlightenment.
And you step forth to complete the mission for which you have come here as a volunteer soul.
I send my blessings to all,
I AM Sundeelia
P.S. I still struggle with this language to convey what is in my Heart. Feel the resonance behind the words and interpret them in your own way. Take what resonates and makes sense and leave the rest.
Here is a video from Infinite Waters that echoes what I have shared above: