THE ALCHEMY OF AWAKENING
“I consumed the seeds of sorrow whole and they sprouted constellations in my chest. Now I speak in stars, words of glowing proof that if you digest darkness, it turns to light.”
The awakening process, I would argue, is one of digesting darkness rather than simply rejecting it. Darkness must be faced, its existence must be accepted and the resulting pain must be dealt with.
I have found that only through conscious assimilation, can it be broken down and transformed into something different.
We may think that it all lies outside of ourselves, but it does, and it does not, because to a certain degree we are all culprits of ignoring, complying, abiding and turning a blind eye to many instances of evil that have touched our lives at different points. The moment we wake up we must confront not only the darkness around us, but the uncomfortable truth of our own inner failings.
This is why awakening hurts, why it feels like a tearing or a burning, because it forces us to look at the part of us that once accepted what should never have been acceptable, but that recognition becomes the raw material of inner transformation.
To digest darkness is to pass it through the fire of consciousness, allowing the shock of truth to break down the ignorance that once kept us numb, and in doing so, we find that the very energy that once entrapped us begins to transform us.
It becomes clarity, it becomes discernment, it becomes the unshakeable knowing that you will never again participate in your own oppression, and this, perhaps, is the first spark of light that grows inside the awakened mind.
We become, through this agonising journey, a kind of alchemist; recognising that energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be changed. Once we allow darkness to move through the furnace of awareness, it begins to transmute, it loses its power to imprison us and it converts to a different form; it becomes clarity, strength, and a powerful inner light that is born not from avoiding the darkness but from transforming it.
Sunny's Journal 